What you see above is the original version of my artwork concept “Self Inflicted” from early 2010. I was still recovering from the severe ups and downs of 2009 in January of 2010 when I created this artwork and came up with its original concept. I believe I was going through a depressive episode at the time or trying to recover from one. I’m not really sure now as it all kind of blurs together after a while.
Read on to see exactly how this artwork has evolved over the years as I attempted to perfect it. To see the most recent and/or final redux of this artwork, see here: Self Inflicted
Here is what I wrote about the original “Self Inflicted” back on January 31, 2010:
This image just sort of “happened” one element at a time. Perhaps it was my subconscious letting me know that I’m a prisoner of my own making. I could escape at any time but I remain for what reason, I do not know.
At left you can see my first try at this concept and at right is my first attempt at a redux from 2013. As you can see, I used most of the same scene and elements as the original with some important changes as well. I changed the focal length of the camera and moved the background further back to give the scene more depth. I also changed the hair model and improved the angel’s skin shaders. Finally, I created a far superior lighting setup.
The 2013 redux captured my original concept as I intended but I have always wanted to do “better” but just didn’t yet know how to go about. It would be several more years before I would figure that out and give this concept another try.
At left is the 2013 redux and at right is the final redux from 2017. Rather than improve upon what I had created before, I started over and created a brand new scene from scratch with similar elements. Now instead of a giant key in the background, she wears a key around her neck. She still has a “halo” of hair on her head and is still in a prison cell but both are of much higher detail. There is also now a window in the cell from which she could also escape because she has wings but again, she chooses not to. This further enhances the concept of the piece.
She is trapped in a prison of her own creation. She could escape as she has the key yet she remains confined for reasons unknown even to her.
The artwork finally looks to me the way I wanted it to look way back when I first came up with the concept. It has all the elements I wanted in the piece and they flow together in such a way that tells the story that I needed to express. I do believe this may very well be the final redux.